Excuses for Lying
I’ve heard these excuses about why a person lies:
I lie because I like you.
I lie because I’m scared of what you think of me.
I lie because I want you to like me.
I lie because I look up to you.
I lie because I’m protecting your feelings.
I lie because I don’t want to hurt you.
I lie because I don’t want to worry you.
I lie because I know you’d get mad about the truth.
I lie because what I say is how I really want things to be. If I want it to be that way, then I can make it that way by believing it is.
I lie because it’s really no big deal.
You don’t need to know everything.
<This> doesn’t have anything to do with you.
I lie because you don’t want me to be silent.
I lie because everyone lies.
You’re the only one who cares about this.
You’re the one with the problem.
I could talk to anyone on the street and they’d agree with me on this.
You should get over it.
Then Jesus said to those Jews who believed Him, “If you abide in My word, you are My disciples indeed. And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.”
John 8:31-32 (KJV)
My responses:
I don’t like to be lied to.
I highly-value the truth.
I want to be fully-known by my loved ones.
I want to be chosen because of who I am, warts and all.
I want to know who I’m dealing with, vice versa.
I want full-disclosure so I can make informed decisions.
I want to deeply know you.
The truth doesn’t hurt nearly as much as being lied to.
The truth is protection from manipulation and fraud. Lies are not.
Half truth is still a lie.
Lying by omission is still lying.
Lying is disrespectful.
Lying protects your false image, your games, and your ego only.
Lying does not protect the person you lie to.
Lying does not protect your integrity and honor.
Lying gives nothing for us, together, to stand on.
Lying makes you unable to know and trust yourself, your words, your actions, your stories and memories.
Lying makes you totally alone: no one really knows you deeply and authentically—not even yourself.
Your lying tells me a lot about you: your conscious, spirit, morals, ethics, values, and principles.
Your lying tells me that you don’t care about me, like me, nor respect me.
Your lying tells me you don’t have self-respect or dignity.
Your lying tells me that you don’t like who you are and what you choose, but won’t correct yourself.
Your lying tells me that you don’t take accountability and responsibility for yourself and your life.
Your lying tells me you don’t have a problem manipulating and duping me.
Your lying tells me you are a weak person with no impulse control.
Your lying makes me question everything you have said and say.
You lying makes me doubt our entire relationship and history., and my feelings for you.
Your lying makes me suspicious of you.
Your lying makes you look like a sketchy, sneaky person.
Your lying makes me wonder what other malice you’re capable of.
Your lying makes me no longer trust you.
Your lying tells me I can’t count on and rely on you.
Your lying tells me you don’t understand or relate to me.
Your lying makes me regret my being vulnerable with you.
Your lying makes me dislike you.
Your lying makes me no longer respect you.
Your lying makes me no longer want a relationship with you.
What the Bible says about lying:
John 8:44
Ye {the Pharisees} are of your father the devil, and the lusts of your father ye will do. He was a murderer from the beginning, and abode not in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he speaketh a lie, he speaketh of his own: for he is a liar, and the father of it.
Should thy lies make men hold their peace? and when thou mockest, shall no man make thee ashamed?
But ye [are] forgers of lies, ye [are] all physicians of no value.
Blessed [is] that man that maketh the LORD his trust, and respecteth not the proud, nor such as turn aside to lies.
The wicked are estranged from the womb: they go astray as soon as they be born, speaking lies.
They only consult to cast [him] down from his excellency: they delight in lies: they bless with their mouth, but they curse inwardly. Selah.
But the king shall rejoice in God; every one that sweareth by him shall glory: but the mouth of them that speak lies shall be stopped.
He that worketh deceit shall not dwell within my house: he that telleth lies shall not tarry in my sight.
A false witness [that] speaketh lies, and he that soweth discord among brethren.
A faithful witness will not lie: but a false witness will utter lies.
A true witness delivereth souls: but a deceitful [witness] speaketh lies.
A false witness shall not be unpunished, and [he that] speaketh lies shall not escape.
A false witness shall not be unpunished, and [he that] speaketh lies shall perish.
If a ruler hearken to lies, all his servants [are] wicked.
Remove far from me vanity and lies: give me neither poverty nor riches; feed me with food convenient for me:
The ancient and honourable, he [is] the head; and the prophet that teacheth lies, he [is] the tail.
We have heard of the pride of Moab; [he is] very proud: [even] of his haughtiness, and his pride, and his wrath: [but] his lies [shall] not [be] so.
Because ye have said, We have made a covenant with death, and with hell are we at agreement; when the overflowing scourge shall pass through, it shall not come unto us: for we have made lies our refuge, and under falsehood have we hid ourselves:
Judgment also will I lay to the line, and righteousness to the plummet: and the hail shall sweep away the refuge of lies, and the waters shall overflow the hiding place.
For your hands are defiled with blood, and your fingers with iniquity; your lips have spoken lies, your tongue hath muttered perverseness.
None calleth for justice, nor [any] pleadeth for truth: they trust in vanity, and speak lies; they conceive mischief, and bring forth iniquity.
And they bend their tongues [like] their bow [for] lies: but they are not valiant for the truth upon the earth; for they proceed from evil to evil, and they know not me, saith the LORD.
And they will deceive every one his neighbour, and will not speak the truth: they have taught their tongue to speak lies, [and] weary themselves to commit iniquity.
Then the LORD said unto me, The prophets prophesy lies in my name: I sent them not, neither have I commanded them, neither spake unto them: they prophesy unto you a false vision and divination, and a thing of nought, and the deceit of their heart.
O LORD, my strength, and my fortress, and my refuge in the day of affliction, the Gentiles shall come unto thee from the ends of the earth, and shall say, Surely our fathers have inherited lies, vanity, and [things] wherein [there is] no profit.
And thou, Pashur, and all that dwell in thine house shall go into captivity: and thou shalt come to Babylon, and there thou shalt die, and shalt be buried there, thou, and all thy friends, to whom thou hast prophesied lies.
I have seen also in the prophets of Jerusalem an horrible thing: they commit adultery, and walk in lies: they strengthen also the hands of evildoers, that none doth return from his wickedness: they are all of them unto me as Sodom, and the inhabitants thereof as Gomorrah.
I have heard what the prophets said, that prophesy lies in my name, saying, I have dreamed, I have dreamed.
How long shall [this] be in the heart of the prophets that prophesy lies? yea, [they are] prophets of the deceit of their own heart;
Behold, I [am] against them that prophesy false dreams, saith the LORD, and do tell them, and cause my people to err by their lies, and by their lightness; yet I sent them not, nor commanded them: therefore they shall not profit this people at all, saith the LORD.
I know his wrath, saith the LORD; but [it shall] not [be] so; his lies shall not so effect [it].
Therefore thus saith the Lord GOD; Because ye have spoken vanity, and seen lies, therefore, behold, I [am] against you, saith the Lord GOD.
And mine hand shall be upon the prophets that see vanity, and that divine lies: they shall not be in the assembly of my people, neither shall they be written in the writing of the house of Israel, neither shall they enter into the land of Israel; and ye shall know that I [am] the Lord GOD.
And will ye pollute me among my people for handfuls of barley and for pieces of bread, to slay the souls that should not die, and to save the souls alive that should not live, by your lying to my people that hear [your] lies?
Because with lies ye have made the heart of the righteous sad, whom I have not made sad; and strengthened the hands of the wicked, that he should not return from his wicked way, by promising him life:
And her prophets have daubed them with untempered [mortar], seeing vanity, and divining lies unto them, saying, Thus saith the Lord GOD, when the LORD hath not spoken.
She hath wearied [herself] with lies, and her great scum went not forth out of her: her scum [shall be] in the fire.
And both these kings' hearts [shall be] to do mischief, and they shall speak lies at one table; but it shall not prosper: for yet the end [shall be] at the time appointed.
They make the king glad with their wickedness, and the princes with their lies.
Woe unto them! for they have fled from me: destruction unto them! because they have transgressed against me: though I have redeemed them, yet they have spoken lies against me.
Ye have plowed wickedness, ye have reaped iniquity; ye have eaten the fruit of lies: because thou didst trust in thy way, in the multitude of thy mighty men.
Ephraim compasseth me about with lies, and the house of Israel with deceit: but Judah yet ruleth with God, and is faithful with the saints.
Ephraim feedeth on wind, and followeth after the east wind: he daily increaseth lies and desolation; and they do make a covenant with the Assyrians, and oil is carried into Egypt.
Thus saith the LORD; For three transgressions of Judah, and for four, I will not turn away [the punishment] thereof; because they have despised the law of the LORD, and have not kept his commandments, and their lies caused them to err, after the which their fathers have walked:
For the rich men thereof are full of violence, and the inhabitants thereof have spoken lies, and their tongue [is] deceitful in their mouth.
Woe to the bloody city! it [is] all full of lies [and] robbery; the prey departeth not;
What profiteth the graven image that the maker thereof hath graven it; the molten image, and a teacher of lies, that the maker of his work trusteth therein, to make dumb idols?
The remnant of Israel shall not do iniquity, nor speak lies; neither shall a deceitful tongue be found in their mouth: for they shall feed and lie down, and none shall make [them] afraid.
And it shall come to pass, [that] when any shall yet prophesy, then his father and his mother that begat him shall say unto him, Thou shalt not live; for thou speakest lies in the name of the LORD: and his father and his mother that begat him shall thrust him through when he prophesieth.
Speaking lies in hypocrisy; having their conscience seared with a hot iron;
God forgives with repentance:
Proverbs 28:13 - He that covereth his sins shall not prosper: but whoso confesseth and forsaketh them shall have mercy.
Acts 3:19 - Repent ye therefore, and be converted, that your sins may be blotted out, when the times of refreshing shall come from the presence of the Lord
1 John 1:9 - If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
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